Neil Feineman

Neil Feineman
Male / 107

Member Since: 8/2/2007
Last Seen: 6/2/2008

http://neilfeineman.uber.com
BIO

I’m a 20th century man who only lately has been feeling the 21st century. With that in mind, most of my professional achievements are now old-school: from magazines I started such as Beach Culture, RayGun, Speak, Gravity, Revolution, from books on everything from geeks to music video to beach volleyball, from consultancies with companies like Disney, Rollerblade and Reebok. People have paid me to write, to teach, to skate and even to dance. But they never, not once, paid me for sex.

I readily admit, it’s taken me awhile to back into today. But I figure it’s time to pay attention to Marshall McLuhan and marry the Internet’s style and substance into something that makes a 20th century guy feel at home. If you can help, I’m all ears.

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December 18, 2007 4:21 PM  (go back to main view)
You Suck!

An Open Letter to the L.A. Metro:

Almost two years ago, to the derision and disbelief of most of my friends, I decided to stop driving and prove it was possible to live without a car in Los Angeles for 12 months, just to see what would happen. At the time, I had hopes of sparking a pedestrian movement that would give bus riding a new face and fill the buses with cultural dialogue, historical information and consciousness-raising initiatives.

That enthusiasm lasted about a year. Through no fault of anyone’s but my own, I decided to abandon any lofty hopes and be satisfied with the idea of cheap, efficient public transportation. But even that has begun to prove unrealistic.

Granted, there are the rare days when everything works. The bus comes on time; the driver is civil; the seats are clean enough to sit on. But this, sadly, is the exception, rather than the rule. Instead, you just accept the fact, especially if you’re taking major thoroughfares such as the Wilshire, Santa Monica Blvd or Sunset lines, all of which supposedly come within 5 to 20 minutes, the bus is going to be filthy, the bus driver sullen and the timetable more a matter of whim than reality.

So, despite all those bright and shiny ads you’re running touting your system as the pride of America with a bunch of cheery, well-scrubbed “bus riders” equating a ride on the bus with a weekend retreat at a luxury hotel, here’s a selection of real-life experiences culled from one week – five days, actually – of life on the metro.

The 720, 11 A.M., 12/13: Bus driver ignores “stop request,” sails through Robertson and stops at La Cienega, approximately ½ mile away. No apology offered, other than a shrug. Any other day, going west, the 720 to Santa Monica rarely comes within 30 minutes. Again, no explanation as to why it is chronically late, particularly during the rush hour when, logic suggests, it would come more frequently.

The 704, 5:45 P.M., 12/14: Despite the front of the bus saying “Santa Monica,” the bus driver stops at Sepulveda as a last stop. Rather than giving an emergency transfer, the bus driver tells me to learn to read.

The 704, 7:30 P.M., 12/16: Wait for 90 minutes for the bus to take me from downtown to Santa Monica, only to find out the bus stop had changed (but not the sign). Bus drivers from another line on the same stop have no information. Since the information booths you used to have are closed, the only way to check is on the website. News flash: If you can afford a blackberry, chances are very good you’re not on the bus.

The 720, 11:15 A.M., 12/17: Gobs of snot and what looks like earwax smeared across the window. Mounds of half-eaten food and a floor sticky with soda on the floor on the seat behind.

The 720, 11 A.M., 12/18: A used hypodermic needle rolls around the floor. As much as you hate to admit it, you don’t really care about me or any of your other patrons. Why should you? You’re the best public transportation system in the country. So I’m taking the bus down to Abbot Kinney and putting down a deposit on a Fortwo. Thanks so much for driving me to it.
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Blog Comments (2):
Posted by RUDJ on January 05, 2008 6:52 PM
Neil you are a soldier of zig when everyone else goes zag 100% ... Fortwo or not, you RUUUUULE !!!!!!!!!!
Posted by sanjay on December 18, 2007 10:26 PM
now that is some angry car less in LA right there!!!
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RECOMMENDED BOOKS

- When the Light Goes by Larry McMurtry
- The Raw Shark Texts by Stephen Hall
- Teenage by Jon Savage
- Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling
- The Archivist’s Story by Travis Holland

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COMMENTS
Eff
Sep 04, 2008 8:34 AM
NEIL! How's it going? Eff, Sada's husband from Australia. Really from Laguna, but from Australia right now. I won't ask if you remember Sada, cuz if you don't you've already stopped ready. Just stumbled across your website and thought I'd say hey. Cya
Apr 04, 2008 10:31 AM
I live in NY. I don't own a car and bike/scooter everywhere. When I visited LA I ended up putting 400 miles on my rental car in 4 days. Oy vey!
Mar 07, 2008 2:06 PM
Mr. Feineman you are a character. Love Love.
Dec 13, 2007 3:09 AM
Thanks for the add!! nice page :)
Oct 17, 2007 8:54 PM
how bout that shanghai dancer? i thought he was pretty cool:-)
Oct 10, 2007 6:04 PM
peep it!
Aug 08, 2007 4:55 PM
alas... we meet again! let's get breakfast next week at that pete's where the actresses hang out ;)
Aug 03, 2007 8:15 PM
we are bag buddies for life.
Aug 03, 2007 8:14 PM
I don't know how you do it... but catch a ride with me to the beach anytime. Nice to see you on Uber Neil. Love the old biz cards !
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